Tag: funny

Baylorisms – Part 5

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I keep saying that I need to keep a list of the funny things B says – because by the time I get to my computer, I forget half of them! She is now at the point where she knows she’s not saying something right and has begun to say “Do you know what I’m talking bout? Does that make sense??” trying to convey her thoughts. Such a crack up and getting smarter by the minute.

Zanya – The name she gives a lot of her stuffed animals. I have no idea where it came from or what it means.

Nayday – Her horse’s name, the only one not named Zanya.

Hanitizer – The combination of Hand Sanitizer

Rondry room – Laundry room. She can say L’s, but for some reason that doesn’t translate to the laundry room.

Loyal-ler – Lawyer. As in “you don’t look like a loyal-ler when you where cowboy boots to work, Daddy”. Jury is still out on whether this is a good or bad thing.

Scoops – the arm motion that goes along with freestyle swim stroke. While watching the Olympics, she announce “oooh, look at her scoops!!”.

Suri’s Burn Book

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I saw on one Melissa F’s Facebook page (what?! you don’t read Fontyfest?? You so crazy) a link to a blog called Suri’s Burn Book. It is, in a word, amazing. Short, snarky and all told from (allegedly) Suri Cruise’s perspective. I am dying and so grateful for this new little gem. Thank you Mrs. Fonty for the introduction to such a lovely and hilarious way to waste 5 minutes of time!

Spelling Lessons

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Apparently I used the wrong version of counsel when writing an email to Peter and my mom this week. This morning I got a post it note on my desk:

I thanked Captain Spelling and then went back about my business. He then proceeded to make fun of my spelling abilities, which, he has known for the last 13 years are less than stellar. I told him that the way I would remember the difference between council and counsel is that the S in legal counsel is for shithead.

That was enough to make Captain Spelling retreat from the office. And gave me an excellent pneumonic device for remembering the difference between the two words.

Random Acts of Kindness

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Scottsdale Moms Blog participates in a Twitter Tasting thing (that’s the best explanation I can do) with Fresh and Easy. It’s a really fun idea – basically Fresh and Easy contacts the SMB group and invites us to participate. Those that are in receive a F&E gift card and the names of three wines. You take your gift card and pick up the designated bottles. Then sign onto a Twitter room (?? I don’t twit so I don’t fully understand what I participate in) and follow the instructions as to which wine we’re tasting first. Then all you have to do is drink and tweet about if you love or hate. Does it sound like a fun and free way to drink? Then I’ve done a good job explaining.

I was contacted by Erin at F&E a few months ago about participating in a tasting but sadly had to decline as Mr.Man was on his way.

While on the phone screaming at Kodak Gallery about where the hell my archive DVD and  where the hell my pictures are on Shutterfly, FedEx arrived with a very heavy package. I began to open and pull out Fresh and Easy brand baby item after item. Perplexed, but still yelling on the phone, I opened the card. It was from Erin and her Fresh and Easy team congratulating us on our upcoming baby! I was so shocked by the sweet gesture, I gave a momentary reprieve to Kodak Gallery. It was like the best and worst customer service all happened in the same 30 seconds.

I was completely struck by how thoughtful someone I have only ever exchanged emails with could be. It’s good inspiration to do random kind acts.

There was also a GIANT chocolate bar in the box…it didn’t make it to the photo….

We’re Alive :)

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Phew. I think I’m safe saying that we are all healed! What I thought was a sinus infection (and in my defense, the doctor agreed with me) turned out to be a nasty virus. Which, of course, B got too just about the time I started thinking I might not die after all. Our air conditioning went out the same weekend (thank goodness for parents who live close, pay their utility bill and weren’t home!) and there was a severe drought of sleep due to the constant coughing and sleeping in someone else’s house (Bear was thoroughly confused and literally paced allll night). It was, in a word, ugly. I don’t think PW has ever been to excited to go to work on a Monday morning.

Bay was out of school last week (this one I had planned for) so we had a week of swim lessons and play dates lined up. Every day started out with breakfast, get dressed and suddenly it was 1pm. I really have no idea where each day went. But it flew by and this week is a blur of doctor’s appointments (for me) and back to school fun late this week (for her). We spent all weekend making her room into their room so get excited for some sneak peek pics. The big reveal comes later in August on Scottsdale Mom’s Blog pregnancy week – there are 5 contributing writers all pregnant!

And thank you to those that checked in after seeing the blog was not updated – it’s nice to be loved 🙂

Millions of Peaches

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Peaches for me. Millions of peaches, peaches for free.

Look out!

Anyone? Anyone? Presidents of the United States of America – or the theme song of eighth grade.

I have been craving peaches this entire pregnancy. Canned don’t cut it. Frozen either. And the little ones from the grocery are either too hard, too soft, no flavor or too far gone. But finally, finally! Costco had the big box of big peaches last weekend. There are a dozen softball sized fruit and after one day sitting in the fruit tower in the kitchen, they are perfect! I’ve eaten all but 2…back to Costco I go!

I’ve been eating them as is, but I have big plans for the next box. Peach and blueberry cake. Sugared peaches. Grilled peaches with amaretto cookies, peach pancakes…my mouth is watering just typing this!

Lelowstone National Park

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As Baylor would say – or Yellowstone to you and me.

Peter is always dying to take a day trip into the park. I am always looking for ways to talk him out of it. We do a lot of driving while in Montana and strapping the kiddo in the car for another long trip seems a little cruel – for her and I as I always am the one trying to entertain, soothe and distract her while in the car. Not to mention I hate car trips – I think they are boring, I get car sick and I never get to drive. Whiney? Maybe. But you drive to San Diego and back in the back seat with a kiddo who is so very over being in the car and let me know how you like it.

Despite all that, I didn’t have a lot to try to talk PW into this year. I can’t ride horses (and neither could he – if he gets to drink and I don’t, then he doesn’t get to ride….) this year and there’s only so much hiking we can do so I gave in and told him to plan the trip. And I have to say that I was pleasantly surprised. The park was packed, but we were able to get around fairly easily and hit a few of the sites; Norris Geyser, lunch in the woods, the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone and some wildlife. B had a moment of get-me-out-of-this-car, but once she got to see some elk up close and personal, the rest of the ride was smooth.

Norris Geyser Basin. It looks like the surface of the moon…

It doesn’t look dangerous, but the temperature of the water is boiling

The color of the water was amazing.

Boiling mud

Steam vent

After Norris, we headed to a campsite to have a picnic. As we wrapped up, B got her first look at a permenate porta potty – basically a hole in the ground with a toilet seat. She screamed and refused to use it. Plan b involved finding a smooth log and let her go as nature intended. She decided that peeing in the wilderness was awesome.

Next up was the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone. I had no idea what to expect and I was totally blown away when I looked over the the little wall to the canyon below.

The color of the water was spectacular

There are like a thousand stairs that take you to the bottom of the falls. I am putting this on the list for next year!

Some bison

Daddy and his girl. And his favorite Beet Seed hat.

The girls

Livingston Round Up

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This year was Baylor’s first trip to the Livingston Round Up Rodeo. We go every year and it’s a blast – the childless version can be seen here….But being pregnant and with Ms. B means we had the slightly less rowdy version this year. However fun none the less! B made it all the way to the spectacular fireworks display complete with patriotic music (the sun doesn’t set until after 9pm so the fireworks started around 10pm). Such a trooper!

Getting to sit with the big girls

The Noni

PW in his rodeo finest

Titi, cousin Zoe’s mom

I had a chance to experiment with my camera and the speed setting a little. The results were pretty darn good!

This is my favorite.

Steer wrestling…this guy is a Wranglers model so I felt a picture was necessary.

And this is the funniest part of the whole evening – this is the rodeo clown with 4 dummies strapped to himself  that move like puppets -they all do the YMCA. It was hilarious and just a pinch disturbing.

I Love a Parade

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No really, I do.  I love the silliness, creativity and pageantry. And in a small town parade, it’s taken to a whole new level – not necessarily a better level than say the Rose Bowl Parade, but a new level just the same.

Poor B had maybe 6 hours of sleep the night before the Livingston 4th of July Parade. She got over an hour of a nap in her bed and then napped the 45 minute drive to the event – I had to wake her up when we got there…which explains why her pigtails are crooked and she looks less than pleased in the first few pictures.

Getting into the spirit

Cousin Zoe!

Cousin Madi. One half of the “big girls” B was chasing around all week

Learning how to pick up candy from the big kids

Noni, Momma and her girl

See? This is why small town parades are the best. Where else are you going to see a plumbing company advertising by putting a toilet on top of a trailer AND making it shoot water like a fountain?!

Circus Overloadus

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Ho.Ly. Cats. I’m even too wiped out to write this post so I’m going to do it in bullet points:

-3 is too young to take your child to the circus. Unless they are totally ADD and enjoy a freakish amount of senory stimulation.

-30 is too old to go to the circus. Unless you are deaf and mostly blind and or enjoy a freakish amount of sensory stimulation.

-Circus animals are by far some of the meanest, most unhappy looking animals I’ve ever seen. I was pretty sure the lion “tamer” was a gonner as each time he walked by one of them, they took a swipe. The horses looked like they were ready to bite and or buck their riders while they were mid pyramid stand.  Perhaps PETA is onto something..

-Why the hell is the circus so long?! We bailed out early after B found my purse more interesting than the acrobats at around an hour and fifteen minutes. We went to lunch with PW, bathroom and then a 2 block walk to the car and the thing STILL WASN’T OVER.

-How does anyone decide they are going to work for the circus? Are there try outs? And what do those job applications look like? Like how do they know they need motorcycle riders that drive on a tight rope with two acrobats hanging beneath them?! Do you have to own your own bubble looking apparatus to hang from and gyrate out of?

-When did it all get so theme-y? Can’t they just have some animals and some fun tricks? Why does there have to be a dragon? And a dragon hunt? I thought circus was a theme.

-Lastly, are the ticket prices so freaking expensive because of all the OSHA requirements? Because my ticket prices were not worth what we saw.

-Lesson learned: no more circus visits until B is at least 10 or unless someone else is taking her. And footing the bill.