What am I going to do with 8 silver champagne coupes? Aside from sitting pretty in the hutch, I don’t have a clue…and yet for $20, I couldn’t leave them at the store. They were crying out for a good home. Fancy drink vessels need homes too.
Tag: humor
Creative Weeding
We live on a great street. We have lots of neighbors with kids and we are friends with a good 80% of our street. Like sit on the patio and have a cocktail, come by for dinner, can you watch my kids for an hour, here’s my spare key kind of friends. It’s awesome.
Friday night, Melissa came by with several bottles of wine (if she ever leaves the wine business, there will be tears). We cracked a bottle and sat on the patio while dinner cooked. I told her about our neighbor to the West kids “borrowing” neighbor to the East’s scooter. In their defense, the scooter was in the front yard. Now, we’re talking all kids involved are 3 years old and younger. Nothing malicious, but there was confusion about where it had gone and why there was a new toy in the garage.
I joked to Melissa that she was safe since she wouldn’t have any toys in her front yard. She thoughtfully sipped her wine before responding: “Do you think if I tied Smarties to the weeds in my grass, they would steal those?”.
I’m pretty sure we woke up the sticky fingered toddlers laughing.
What Type of Mom are You?
Stephanie just wrote a great post on Many Hats of a Mom about what kind of mom she is. The post has a link to an Oprah quiz where it asks a series of questions to see what kind of mom you are; The Funseeking Mom, The Alpha Mom, The Helicopter Mom or the Free Range Mom.
After taking the quiz, I’m overwhelmingly The Helicopter Mom. Which, to be honest, sounds way worse than the explanation:
The Helicopter Mom: Helicopter Mom is hovering just out sight, keeping an eye on her kids and yours. She is fully supplied with a first aid kit, a GPS and a complete computer printout of the week’s homework for all her kids. She could teach a master class in calendar-keeping, managing the family schedule like an orchestra conductor. Don’t forget to refuel, Helicopter Mom!
Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. A few months ago I was concerned Baylor was in the wrong group for swim lessons because she wasn’t being challenged enough…and then some sane part of my brain reminded me that SHE’S TWO YEARS OLD and I calmed down. Now she’s in a great class so that’s helpful too.
Also, I think it’s important to note that it’s Sunday night while I’m writing this. Dinner is done and the kitchen is clean. Lunches are made and the coffee is ready to hit “go”. Baylor’s registration for the 2012 school year is complete with checks paper clipped to them and is in the bag with the class snack for tomorrow.
Yeah, that test is way off base….really, I would just like a nicer title. Like “really organized mom”. Or “calendar conductor” or something else cool. Help me out!
Zyrtec Anonymous
I have been taking the allergy medicine Zyrtec for literally 8 months. When stuff is blooming or blowing around or just plain growing, I get a dizzy headache from it. And let me tell you what fun it is to take care of a two-year old who thinks being dizzy is super fun…
I am not one for medication so I decided I would try an experiment. If I stopped taking it, would I get a headache? Nope! I felt great! I sound like a schizophrenic who decides they feel so good with their meds, they don’t need them any more…any way that was about 3 days ago. Two days ago I was running with Bay to the park and got a crazy itching attack. My arms and back itched like mad! I figured it was something in the air because it seemed to dissipate when I got home.
Then yesterday, my sister Ali noticed I had drawn blood on my shoulder I had itched it so hard. I was like the crazy crackhead from the Chappell Show. I don’t remembering itching that bad since right after Baylor was born and I had a reaction to some medication – in the video of her in the hospital, I can be seen the background scratching all over and asking PW to repeatedly scratch my feet since I couldn’t quite get to them.
I honestly thought I somehow developed an allergy to our laundry detergent. I changed shirts, slapped on anti itch cream and tried to ignore the incessant need to scratch…and then gave up and popped a Zyrtec convinced something in the air was bugging me. And predictably, the itching stopped. I decided it was time to Google “Zyrtec itchy arms” and I kid you not, like 20+ forums popped up all with people complaining of Zyrtec itching withdrawal. Apparently the company doesn’t list this as a side effect (convenient) however tons of people agree that after taking the medicine for a long time, it makes you itch like mad while you’re coming down off the stuff.
So apparently instead of detox poncho, I’m going to have to get the oven mitt version so I don’t scar myself…
Probably
There are a few words whose meaning is a little lost on Bay. One of these words is probably. Much like Joey on Friends could never figure out how to use air quotes, Bay uses probably all the time, but rarely the right way. It makes for some pretty funny conversations.
As I walked into B’s room one morning long before the sun was up, this is the chat we had:
“Morning munchkin – you’re up a little early”
“Hi Mommy. I probably awake.”
“Yeah, I got that one kiddo.”
“I probably can’t sleep any more.”
“Ok ok, I give, let’s get some breakfast.”
“I probably want some eggs, please.”
Such a crack up – even at such an ugly hour!
The Goon Room 2011
WordPress put out a Year In Review for The Goon Room. It’s so fun to see all the stats and memories from the past year! Thank you for reading TGR and I hope to keep you entertained for another year. Just 8 posts to go until I hit 300 – yikes!
Here’s an excerpt:
The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 16,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 6 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.
Little Foodie
For some freak reason, the munchkin is totally into some fun, new foods. I really don’t care what the reason is, but I like it!
Baked beans? Not such a far stretch – she loves beans and they are sweet so this makes sense. But I just think it’s so fun.
Cantaloupe – again, not a big deal, but I love that we have a new fruit.
Chili, even with a little kick – she started with eating the beans out of my bowl and now she’s asking for a bowl of her own.
Quiche – she loves eggs so I don’t know why I didn’t think of making her quiche…but we enjoyed family breakfast together this weekend and we all ate the same thing. This is actually a bigger deal than it sounds.
Minnie’s Day Out
Every morning after breakfast, I turn Bay loose to run amok and watch cartoons. Tuesday morning she was particularly busy – she was playing with her new toys and bouncing from room to room.
As PW was ready to head out, she grabbed her new Minnie Mouse rolling backpack and helped Peter carry his stuff to the car. When she got there, she told him that Minnie Mouse was in the bag and that she was going to work with him. She kissed him and Minnie and headed back into the house.
When he got home, he wheeled Minnie inside and Bay greeted them both with kisses. She began to unpack the bag – it was then I realized that not only had she packed Minnie in the bag, she had packed a tupperware full of play food, a dish towel and a blanket. She explained that Minnie needed a lunch, a place mat and her blankie for nap time.
I sat down and marveled at how thoughtful and sweet she had been. And when I hugged and kissed her for the 19th time, she looked at me as if I had lost my marbles – which only made it better that her thoughtfulness was second nature.
Christmas Recap
Christmas is always a whirlwind of family parties, church, food and wrapping paper and this year was no different. We are truly blessed to have such a wonderful family – we were missing a few members this year to their in-laws, but we managed to adjust tradition and make it a beautiful holiday.
We kept with the tradition of the family sneaking all their gifts to one house so that the kids awake/arrive to a sea of presents. This year we hosted gift opening and it was a blast. PW and I both went to Bay’s room when she woke up and the first question out of her mouth was “did Santa come?”. We told her yes and that he had eaten his cookies and milk and that the reindeer loved their carrots. Her response? “did he put his dishes in the sink?”. Clearly she is my child.
She got to open one gift first thing – her new backhoe scooter – complete with a tool kit. What? Not everything has to be pink and pretty! She loved that she would have something that she could get around on quickly (she hasn’t quite mastered her trike yet) when she plays with Britain down the street.
She beeps when she backs up
“rip and tear!!”
Once she was done opening her presents, she asked for a “time out” in her crib. Which I think was a nice way of saying “overloaded”
“Boots like Morgan!!!”
We switched up our usual schedule a bit which left Christmas day afternoon open – which meant plenty of mimosas at brunch and a nice long nap for the whole family. The best part was that we had several friends stop by. Normally getting together with friends means much planning and coordinating of calendars, but the shared day off by all meant lots of very welcome impromptu visitors. We got to catch up with a great friend and best man from our wedding, Ryan and by Baylor’s Godfather Joe and his fiance Brandy. There was also a convoy of new bikes, scooters and cars with the neighborhood kids while the parents sat on the patio and sipped champagne. It was a perfect holiday.
After Bay had gone to bed last night, PW and I enjoyed our gift from my parents, a 2007 bottle of Cakebread Cabernet (we typically by wine base on the fact it’s under $15, not so much on the year). We were snuggled on the couch when PW looked over at the coffee table full of new Legos and said:
“Your Lego tower is pretty wonky”.
“It’s a tree” I replied.
“Wow. That’s a pretty crappy tree.”
“Listen, I don’t work at Lego Land, ass. Use your imagination!”
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!!
Thank you all for reading The Goon Room, for all your comments and words of advice. I’m grateful for all of them! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday filled with family, friends, memories and much happiness.
Hand print Santa by Baylor Wand
I love looking at all our friend’s smiling faces!
It wouldn’t be Christmas without torturing Bear with some antlers.
Baylor’s Christmas list:
1. Boots like Morgan (her best buddy has a rad pair of green galoshes)
2. Presents.
Well said little lady!
The Goon Room 