I always worry that I’m not doing enough for the kids. Not reading enough. Not playing enough. Not being patient enough. And that I’m going to give them permanent issues because they are sharing a room. Worry worry worry. You want the best for your kids so you work to give them the moon…but sometimes the moon isn’t totally necessary.

When my sister was in kindergarten, she was sent to the nurse for a bump or bruise. She came home from school that day enamored by the fact that the nurse had “made” ice. She begged my mom to ask the nurse for the recipe. Perplexed, my mom agreed. She realized later that the nurse used ice-cube trays – we had an ice maker so Ali had never seen a tray before.

My niece Madi used to beg my step sister to please turn on the “normal” radio in the car coming home from school. Her friends didn’t have satellite radio so she wanted to listen to the free radio that her friends were listening to.

The other night while getting Baylor out of the tub, she told me how she had been in the bathroom at a friend’s house recently and how she thought they had a HUGE window in the bathroom. But when she pulled back the curtain, she found it was actually the bathtub. Better yet, the bathtub HAD A SHOWER IN IT!! The look of pure joy on her face over the idea of a bathtub and shower together was priceless. This as I’m pulling her out of the claw foot tub that took weeks to get, was installed incorrectly, had to be removed and then put back into place and cost a small fortune…if I had only known she would have been more impressed by a tub shower.

The moral that I need to remember is this: no matter what the gift is, the box is most likely going to be more fun. And that’s a good thing. They are going to enjoy the fact that Baylor used to climb into Auggie’s crib in the morning to play and that they used to wake each other up in the middle of the night. They will laugh about how they put stickers all over each other behind me as I scrambled to get a few things done in the office (hell, they do that now).

At the very least, this will all be good things to talk about at therapy some day. So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.

Amen, Sister

One of my best friends Chrissy sent me an article yesterday – really she tagged me on facebook with the caption “Carry on Warrior” Wisch Wand, you’re going to love this”. And in true friend-who-knows-you-all-to-well form, I did.

The article is pretty much the premise of The Goon Room: sometimes being a parent is just downright gross. And annoying. And exhausting. And not fun. It talks about those annoying people who stop you in the grocery store and tell you to be sure to cherish every moment – and they are usually telling you this on a day when you’ve not had a shower, slept a collective 3 hours, your baby is screaming while simultaneously spitting up on you…again.

The tag line of the article is “Carpe Diem!!!” – or seize the day to you and me. The article is hilarious, truthful and sweet – I love how this momma is able to laugh at the gross stuff, shrug off “failures” and focus on the small wins. This is the kind of mom I strive to be.

I’m also going to start yelling “CARPE DIEM!!” instead of “WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME???”. Mostly because I think thinking about how I want to remember every moment of Baylor being a child – even the annoying ones – will make me chuckle.

Here’s the article:


What Type of Mom are You?

Stephanie just wrote a great post on Many Hats of a Mom about what kind of mom she is. The post has a link to an Oprah quiz where it asks a series of questions to see what kind of mom you are; The Funseeking Mom,  The Alpha Mom, The Helicopter Mom or the Free Range Mom.

After taking the quiz, I’m overwhelmingly The Helicopter Mom. Which, to be honest, sounds way worse than the explanation:

The Helicopter Mom: Helicopter Mom is hovering just out sight, keeping an eye on her kids and yours. She is fully supplied with a first aid kit, a GPS and a complete computer printout of the week’s homework for all her kids. She could teach a master class in calendar-keeping, managing the family schedule like an orchestra conductor. Don’t forget to refuel, Helicopter Mom!

Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. A few months ago I was concerned Baylor was in the wrong group for swim lessons because she wasn’t being challenged enough…and then some sane part of my brain reminded me that SHE’S TWO YEARS OLD and I calmed down. Now she’s in a great class so that’s helpful too.

Also, I think it’s important to note that it’s Sunday night while I’m writing this. Dinner is done and the kitchen is clean. Lunches are made and the coffee is ready to hit “go”. Baylor’s registration for the 2012 school year is complete with checks paper clipped to them and is in the bag with the class snack for tomorrow.

Yeah, that test is way off base….really, I would just like a nicer title. Like “really organized mom”. Or “calendar conductor” or something else cool. Help me out!

It’s Nice to Know

I think every mom worries/wonders/prays they are doing a good job raising their children. And I think often, the little buggers are quicker to pick up on the “bad” or less favorable things we say rather than the good stuff (read Baylor yelling “WHAT DID I SAY?? DID I SAY YES OR DID I SAY NO??” in my tone and inflection).

But once in a while we see them doing something that we know they learned from us. And it’s a nice thing. And it shows that maybe they are getting as much of (or more hopefully) of the good things we’re teaching them and not all the “patience lost” moments. I got a little of this reward on Saturday when I walked by Baylor’s room and found her snuggled in her chair with Minnie Mouse, a blanket and a book. She was quietly “reading” the story to Minnie. I watched her for a few seconds before she looked up and smiled and then went back to her book.