Baylorisms – Part 5

I keep saying that I need to keep a list of the funny things B says – because by the time I get to my computer, I forget half of them! She is now at the point where she knows she’s not saying something right and has begun to say “Do you know what I’m talking bout? Does that make sense??” trying to convey her thoughts. Such a crack up and getting smarter by the minute.

Zanya – The name she gives a lot of her stuffed animals. I have no idea where it came from or what it means.

Nayday – Her horse’s name, the only one not named Zanya.

Hanitizer – The combination of Hand Sanitizer

Rondry room – Laundry room. She can say L’s, but for some reason that doesn’t translate to the laundry room.

Loyal-ler – Lawyer. As in “you don’t look like a loyal-ler when you where cowboy boots to work, Daddy”. Jury is still out on whether this is a good or bad thing.

Scoops – the arm motion that goes along with freestyle swim stroke. While watching the Olympics, she announce “oooh, look at her scoops!!”.

Stranger Danger?

I am a paranoid person – not a tin foil on my head, no Face Book page, off the grid kind of paranoid…but I am convinced that there is danger around every corner. I’ve roped PW into my insanity too and my mom feeds it as she is also convinced of the constant danger around us. Therefore it’s natural and B is picking up on a little of it – I’m not teaching her that the aliens are coming, but I do try to temper being friendly to people with being aware of strangers. More than once I have said that she can’t stay in the car by herself, play out in our front yard alone or talk to adults she doesn’t know without Mommy there because there are people who do steal kids. I’m not trying to freak her out, but I would rather her be overly cautious and come home at night than be concerned with offending someone she doesn’t know and never being heard from again.

That said, these conversations came to a head last week. We were at the grocery store and a little old couple was everywhere I needed to be. They were in front of the onions, blocking the corn and man handling every banana. Every time I turned around, one of them or their cart was in my way. I was hustling so I parked the cart with Baylor in the seat and made a bee-line for the strawberries when I saw an opening. The cart was no more than 4 feet from me, but B’s guard instantly went up and when the lady of the couple asked Baylor “Hi there. What’s your name?” B lowered her chin and looked straight at the woman with a don’t-mess-with-me face and said “Don’t try to steal me”.

I heard the entire transaction and was completely unable to stop myself from laughing out loud. The little old lady did not think it was funny so I quickly countered by letting Bay know it was ok to answer nicely since I was with her. Thankfully the woman and her hubby hurried off and kept their distance from us. Which lead to B and I giggling for the rest of the trip. Two problems solved; old people out of our way and lesson learned that even nice looking old people are potential kidnappers.

I mean really. It doesn’t get more intimidating than this….

Baylorisms – Part 4

Nishan – The Phonenician Resort where Aunt Ali works and where we sneak into the playground. Ssshhh….

Q-she Grge – Curious George

Q-she Grge. Good Monkey. Always very q-she – Curious George was a good little monkey and always very curious

Barilla – Gorilla

How your baby going? – What she asks Ali while she pats Ali’s belly. We think a combination of how are you doing and what’s going on.

What ARF you do in? – Not sure why she says arf, but it makes me laugh every time

Miska! Mooseka! Mickey Mouse! – the magic words for Mickey Mouse Club House

What his mommy’s name? – In Bay’s world, there is a mommy, a daddy and a kiddo – in reality it’s a husband, wife and sometimes a kiddo. So when she asks what someone’s mommy or daddy’s name is, she really means spouse. And trying to explain boyfriend and girlfriend is just a lost cause.

Modern Marvels

One of my mom’s favorite childhood stories about my sister Ali is when she came home asking my mom for a recipe for ice. Ali had been in the nurse’s office that day at school and the nurse had pulled out ice cube trays and popped out a few for a scrapped knee. Ali was in awe – we had an ice maker so she had never seen a tray of ice before and was totally enamored.

My step sister told me recently that her daughter asked to listen to the radio – when she put on XM radio, Madi said “no mom, like the real radio. Can we listen to the real radio sometime?”.

This past weekend it was my turn. At a friend’s house for a party, Bay and I went to the bathroom to wash hands. While in there she stared at the shower curtain. She gently pulled it back and said “Oh neat! The bath tub!”. I didn’t get it at first, but I guess she’s never really seen a bathtub with a curtain pulled across it. Oh how fascinating the world is when you’re two.

Probably

There are a few words whose meaning is a little lost on Bay. One of these words is probably. Much like Joey on Friends could never figure out how to use air quotes, Bay uses probably all the time, but rarely the right way. It makes for some pretty funny conversations.

As I walked into B’s room one morning long before the sun was up, this is the chat we had:

“Morning munchkin – you’re up a little early”

“Hi Mommy. I probably awake.”

“Yeah, I got that one kiddo.”

“I probably can’t sleep any more.”

“Ok ok, I give, let’s get some breakfast.”

“I probably want some eggs, please.”

Such a crack up – even at such an ugly hour!

I Like You

This morning while changing Baylor’s Pull Up, she put her hands on my face and said:

“Mommy, I like your shirt. And you ponytail and your headband. And I like your eyes and your mouth. And I like your boogers.”

With “boogers” she cracked up. As did I. I asked her if she meant the rest of it but she was too busy giggling at her own joke to respond. I like to think that she meant all of it!