Category: Tales from the Crib

The Grinch Who Stole Night Night

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For months now, Baylor has required various stuffed animals, books and other talisman in order to fall asleep. Sometimes she’s literally sleeping on top of them so that all of them, and her, can be tucked in. Because of this, I usually sneak in her room about an hour after she goes to sleep to pluck out several items and move others to the foot of the crib (I can buy myself 15  more minutes of sleep in the mornings if she has a book and an animal).

I have perfected the art of lightly plucking the toys, blankets, pillows, books, tea cups, wooden angels, etc from under her or around her so that I don’t wake her up. I always think I must look like the Grinch nabbing Cindy Loo Who’s candy cane and sugar plumbs – quickly and nimbly sliding each item away from Baylor.

The other night she was dead asleep. I was pulling out the usual items when, without opening her eyes, she snatched back her Spot the Dog  book and said “no. My book” and clutched it to her chest. I realized that maybe I wasn’t as stealthy as I thought….or the kiddo has inherited both sleep talking and sleep walking (or grabbing in her case) from her parents!

PB&J Sashimi

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We don’t usually get to eat together as a family during the week so we make it a priority to eat almost all our meals together on the weekends. This Saturday we got take out from one of our favorite places, Dozo sushi. It is by far, one of the hidden gems in Scottsdale.

While PW and I enjoyed salmon sushi, a Vegas roll and a Rainbow roll, Bay enjoyed a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, a fruit smoothie and carrots. She was loving using the plastic forks that came with dinner – but then became obsessed with using the chop sticks. So we handed her a pair and cut up her sandwich so she could grab a few bites. And I have to say, she did pretty well!!

 

What?? I use chop sticks all the time.

allllmossttt got it….

Success!!!

The best part? The novelty of the chop sticks means she ate every last thing on her plate!

What I Learned on Vacation

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We spent the holiday weekend in Coronado, CA. We’ve take a trip there, long or short, every year since I can remember. It’s our happy place and it’s so much fun to get to share it with Baylor.

We met my mom, sister Ali and her husband Gary (or Jerry as he was known for most of the trip) and my step sister Nancy and her kiddos Blaise and Madi. It was a big group with high expectations for doing as little as possible. Which we did quite well.

Our first day on the beach, we pulled our wagon full of toys, boards, towels and snacks to the perfect piece of sandy paradise. We ran out into the water, caught a few waves, threw the football and then settled in for some gossip magazine reading. I kept waiting for B to run over to me and demand a new activity, snack or some other form of entertainment, but it never came. I watched her and Madi contently dig in the sand. They dug, poured, washed, filled and held the sand. All while silently enjoying each other’s company.

It occurred to me that not only does Bay really love Madi, but the reason she was so content to just play was because it was just play. No one was asking her what color the shovel was. Or how many buckets had sand in them or if the water was hot or cold. There was no overt learning going on, it was just quiet play. I realized that had I been sitting there, I would have been making it a teaching moment – and not that that is a bad thing, but sometimes we just need to sit and dig.

So the next day we did just that. No talking. No fuss, just patted sand castles into place and washed them away with a watering can. All while just enjoying the sound of the waves.  Lesson learned: less talk and more play.


Scottsdale Moms Blog

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Today I am so excited to share with all of you an article I wrote for Scottsdale Moms Blog!

I met Joy (a co-creator of the site) a few weeks ago and noticed her email address was @scottsdalemomsblog. I asked her what the site was and if they took contributing writers. Several conversations, ideas and weeks later, my first article on nursery decorating is up! I’m hoping to write more kid related Do It Yourself articles for them too. Don’t worry, you can get your fill of snarky mommy stories in The Goon Room like always – this will just be for my creative, less sarcastic side!

If you are a local mom, be sure to subscribe to Scottsdale Moms Blog and also like them on FaceBook. They have amazing playdates, great giveaways and insightful articles, all new and fresh every day. Enjoy!

www.scottsdalemomsblog.com

It’s a Good Thing You’re Cute, Kid

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Maybe it’s the heat. Maybe she’s got a molar coming in. Maybe her new-found independence from preschool is being demonstrated at home. Maybe she’s just two but the munchkin is making me crazy this week!

This is an actual conversation that happened this week in the car:

“Baylor. Shoes. Off.”

“No, please leave your shoes on.”

“Shoes. Off. Now.”

“B, we’re almost to the store. Please leave your shoes on.”

minor meltdown and then reluctantly the shoes go back on.

“Yea!! Good listening!!”

“Shoes. Off. Again. Mommy.”

dirty look from the front seat…..

“Yea Baylor!!! I did it! Shoes! On!”

“I think you’re missing the point kid…”

 

That is a nice version of the battles and lessons of the week! If I say yes, she says no. If I say do it, she says no. If I say no, she says yes.  If she gets rewarded for listening well, then she does the bad behavior all over to get the reward. I either need her to move on to the next phase or for it to cool down so she can go out and, as my mom would say, blow the stink off….

What’s in Baylor’s Bag – Crib Edition

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On Monday night, I was at a meeting for the water company during Baylor’s bed time. I snuck in her room when I got home to give her a kiss and pull a few of her stuffed animals out of her crib. What I found was this:

Not just your average crib fair. Here’s what she was snoozing with:

Cat

Minnie Mouse

Franchesca the doll

Baby

Baby’s bottle

A moose

5 books

A plumb

A banana

3 tea cups and saucers

2 angels

A pillow

And the flowers that are on the table next to crib that she can grab and pull in

Momversation

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While at a Scottsdale Moms Blog playdate last week, I was standing in line to get a balloon animal for Baylor. Yes, I was standing in line, Baylor was running amok near the wild animal table. She pretends to like the animals, but really, she’s just there for the hand sanitizer. I had an eye on my wild woman and was chatting with my friend/neighbor and another mom who were also waiting in line.

After a few minutes, I stopped to let the ladies I was speaking with know that I was in fact listening to them, I just needed to keep both eyes on B so that she didn’t free the Chinchilla or something more creepy crawly from Jungle Jill. They both laughed and said “I haven’t had a conversation while looking at the person I was talking to since my oldest was born!”. It dawned on me – this was not a conversation, but a momversation.

A momverstaion is a conversation between two or more mothers that A. does not require eye contact with anyone but your kids B. is paused more than once to wipe a hand, pick up a crying kiddo or yell “stop with the hand sanitizer already!!” only to be picked right back up like nothing happened and C. can be had doing any kind of activity including nursing, feeding, changing a diaper, etc.

It is a skill that is honed among moms. It’s difficult to learn and requires much patience and practice. Especially when there is a severe drought of sleep in the household. But it is a necessity if one ever wants to have a meaningful conversation with a friend, husband or anyone for that matter. So next time you’re talking to a friend who is a mom and she does not look at you, just know that she is using her honed skill of multi tasking, or momversating.

How Not to Use the Potty

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Good God I hate potty training. A lot has to do with trying to convince Baylor that this in inappropriate:

She gets it. She totally gets what she’s supposed to do. The problem is that she wants to sit on the potty ALL THE TIME. It’s a constant routine of sit, wipe, wash and then re-diaper and dress. I’m talking like 6 times an hour. It is making me craaaazzzyyy!!!! I vote for diapers and let her college roommate show her the ropes.

Band-Aids Fix All

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Peter came home from work on Monday note feeling well. It might be the second time in his 5 years at the firm. He told Bay he had a headache and was going to take a nap. She was so excited to snuggle in bed with him and break out her new doctor’s kit. She also insisted he needed an Elmo band-aid on his head – not only because it looked cool, but because it would make it feel better. She topped off the bandage with a kiss and settled in for some “tar-toons” (cartoons).

 

The CarCart – Bain of my Existance

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What I want to know is this: who is the asshole who created the car cart at the grocery store?? Because this person should be forced to push this contraption around with them everywhere they go and see what a pain in the ass it is.

First of all, the placement of the car is not helpful. It’s low and in front of the basket which makes it impossible to A. steer and B. see where you’re going. Many an end of aisle display has been damaged by these beasts.

Second, because the actual car part is low to the ground, the kiddo is constantly hanging out a window or the windshield trying to get a better view. Or worse case, she decides it’s more fun to push the cart. Thus making what is already an annoying process, impossible.

Third, the damn things are always filthy. I even asked the manager at Safeway (who is on a first name basis with both Baylor and I because we’re there so much) if they could clean them. He says they sprayed them in bleach and scrubbed and they still look like a herd of pigs stomped through them.

I’ve had to resort to more and more elaborate lies to keep B out of them. The car is out of gas, it’s stuck, it’s broken, it’s only for big kids…the list goes on an on. And then there are days where the lies just don’t work and I give into the persistence. Only to end up pushing the cart with the help of my assistant – which turns a half hour trip into an hour plus. All the while cursing the car cart….