So we left off at our return flight…we flew on Allegient Air out of Mesa Gateway Airport. It’s a new discount airline, but it flies direct to a lot of small towns. Overall, I give the travel an “A”. However, the travel time weighed heavily as there are a lot of little negatives. For example…

To start, you pay for EVERYTHING. Bag? Fee. Want a specific seat? Say, next to your 13 month old? Fee. Want to get on first? Fee. Drink? Fee. Snack? Fee. I’m surprised there wasn’t a credit card slot on the bathroom door – although I didn’t check so maybe there was. Also, they don’t preboard people with kids – not a huge deal, but it is kind of nice to get a chance to gate check the stroller, find your seat, get the car seat strapped in, get the kid strapped in, strap yourself in, you get the picture.

I was calm until it was finally our turn to board and there were people gathered around the seating area waiting for their row – blocking the path to the gate. I had to restrain Peter from violently and “accidentally” bumping a woman out of the way. Why people, why? The plane is not leaving without you and if it was, why would standing directly in front of the gate but 12 feet away stop it?!

We also had 2 flight attendants stop us to check Baylie’s car seat to make sure it was airplane ready – ok, not a problem. But the one on the plane (my mom would describe her as the one they keep chained in the back and only let her out to growl at complainers) loudly and rudely told us that Bay’s seat was “unsafe”. Huh? I have to think even a standard car seat strapped into an airplane seat is going to be marginally safer than her squirming out of a lap belt! She also told us that she couldn’t sit by herself – we had to produce a boarding pass for her to reassure her that we weren’t pilfering an empty seat on an, only partially full mind you, flight. Good think B is such a cutie, they can’t say no to her.

Lastly, who are the people who get up to go to the front (forward?) bathroom before the seatbelt sign is off? Even if you haven’t been on a plane since September 11th, you’d have to think that that kind of action might warrant a negative outcome. So watching the guy argue with the flight attendant got my terrorist radar up (I had my belt ready so Peter could tie him up with it) – but thankfully he was just a dumbass who didn’t get the memo nor the reminder to hit the head prior to boarding.

So, the lesson is – bring a book, don’t shuffle your cards and pay attention to the seatbelt sign and pee before you get on the plane. And travel with a cute kiddo.

I always find it amazing what people find appropriate behavior on a plane. We were just in Montana visiting the fam and I was very anxious about Baylie’s first flight. B is a pretty easy-going kiddo; not much upsets her. But I was worried she would be that kid who just screams the entire time. I packed juice, milk, bottles, snacks, toys, books, her blanket, a favorite stuffed animal, a sweatshirt, the portable DVD player and lots of Baby Einstein (God bless Baby Einstein!) and if all else failed, my keys and cell phone for her entertainment and comfort. It was a ridiculous amount of items. But it paid off – after playing with the cell phone and various other toys, drinking a bottle at take off, and then watching part of a DVD, she passed out until we landed two hours later. Amazing!

In my efforts to keep her happy, I neglected to pack enough entertainment for me. When I used to travel to DC for work, I had an insane fear of running out of reading material (I once played solitaire on my Ipod for 2 hours after finishing my book and magazines  – my eyes wouldn’t focus for hours after) so I usually travel with two books plus magazines and an Ipod. However, there is a limit to what two people can carry – a baby (yes, I did contemplate having her wear a backpack), two carry on bags, a jogger and a car seat is PLENTY.

After finishing People magazine, I was out of things to do. The kiddo was happily sleeping and I was ready to sleep too (we started out at 2am, woo! I’ll sleep when I’m dead!) but couldn’t because of the constant sound of someone shuffling cards. Why on earth does anyone think that it is ok to participate in such a loud and annoying activity in a confined public space?! Sure, sure, play cards. But don’t freaking shuffle them for 10 minutes in between hands!

I started looking around checking out fellow passengers to pass the time. I noticed 2 other people just sitting there –  no magazine, no book, no bag, no ipod, no annoying cards, no nothing. Not trying to fall asleep, just staring straight ahead. Terrorist? My normal paranoia would lead me to believe so, however, who wants to blow up a regional jet headed to Billings Montana? My guess is no one. So my question is this: what kind of weirdo gets on a plane for 2+ hours and doesn’t bring something to do?! I at least had one magazine that I could go back and like reread or something, so don’t go saying “but you didn’t have anything to do on the plane”.  But to bring absolutely nothing?! Weirdo.

The return flight was uneventful as far as the kiddo goes – but the people were just as strange. Stay tuned for part 2 of the Annoying Skies where we discuss the people that line up long before their row number is called and block the way to the gate, the flight attendant who argued that Baylie couldn’t sit in her car seat in her own (PAID FOR) seat because it wasn’t safe (yeah, I was confused to), and the dumbass who gets up before the seatbelt sign is off to use the bathroom and then argues with the flight attendant (all together now: TERRORIST!).

This is not a political blog. I do not want it to be a political blog. I don’t even like politics, they make me want to nap. However, I do feel it necessary to address a few things so that my friends, family and other super smart readers of this blog understand that everyone living in Arizona is not insane. I am, however, being careful not to go on a full rant as I don’t want Sheriff Joe showing up on my front door step for making degrading remarks. I’m sure after my blog on the Terrorist Fund (what?! you didn’t read that one?? well you should!!) that I’m on some FBI watch list for using the “T” word too much…

If you decide at any point in this blog that you disagree with me, lets promise each other a few things: we will stay friends and we will never ever talk politics with each other.

I’m not really sure where to start. It seemed all was pretty ok here in the desert. Sure, we can’t balance the budget, the state is broke and the local economy is tanking, but these are normal things we deal with in a recession. Then all of a sudden, the clock rolled back to 1809 and we’re legalizing concealed weapons, stopping people because they are brown and making the president prove that he was born in America?? Did someone drink canal water or something?

Now, we are gun people. We own guns, we shoot guns, we respect guns. However I’m not sure why the legislature felt the need to legalize concealed weapons. People have always been allowed to have a concealed weapon with a permit – why do we need to throw that out the window? AND you could carry without a permit as long as you could see it. I’ve been to Bass Pro, I’ve seen the tough guys rolling around with a revolver on their hip – just in case some stuff starts to go down.. on a Sunday… in the fly fishing department…in Mesa. As long as the process was working (which it was because we have first hand knowledge of this process) why mess with it? Now we’re going to let any ya-hoo legally carry a gun we can’t see? Sure sure, someone already carries a gun that we can’t see without a permit. But do we really want to take away the ability to arrest a dangerous person for doing so?

I’m ignoring the “Birther Bill”. It’s too stupid to address and it’s embarrassing our state.

Lastly, the Immigration Bill. All I’m going to say is this – how does it not lead to racial profiling? What are the measures that should be used for just cause to stop someone and ask them to prove they are a citizen if you’re not looking at their skin color, language or culture? Is it the type of music they listen to? So if they are playing Kenny Chesney they are legal and if you’re listening to Pitbull you’re not??

Ok, I’ve had my rant. Again, this will most likely be the last time I’ll write something political, but I feel it had to be said. I just had to get the thought in people’s minds that not everyone in AZ agrees with the madness!

And if you disagree – write you’re own blog, but don’t stop reading mine. I have a dream of being Julie and Julia one day 😉